Box Office Scene

(ISAAC is on the phone with an ELDERLY WOMAN, one of his favorites, who sometimes calls to offer him free tickets to things. It’s one of those times.)

ELDERLY WOMAN: I have symphony tickets for Tuesday night, although I’m sure you’re working or something. I can give you a pair.
ISAAC: What time?
ELDERLY WOMAN: 7:00.
ISAAC: Oh, sh — shoot, I can’t –
ELDERLY WOMAN: You were going to say shit.
ISAAC: I was, I’m sorry. You caught me.
ELDERLY WOMAN: You can say it.
ISAAC: I can?
ELDERLY WOMAN: Sure. You’re a gentleman and you’re trying to be polite because I’m your elder. But I say shit all the time.
ISAAC: You do?
ELDERLY WOMAN: Are you kidding? I’m 78 and I’ve lived in New York all my life; you bet I say shit. I don’t give a fuck. I say whatever I please.
ISAAC: Oh my god! I love this.
ELDERLY WOMAN: You fucking love this.
ISAAC: I fucking love this.
ELDERLY WOMAN: That’s better.
ISAAC: Let’s talk like this more often.
ELDERLY WOMAN: OK.

5 Responses to Box Office Scene

  1. Glad you have an elderly friend. But shoot, I would be a bit cautious with your intercourse with that lady.

  2. I f…reaking love this! (& M&D’s response!)

  3. I think you need to start having lunch dates with this women and then write a play based on the relationship. I love your banter with one another. make it so.

  4. I want to be this lady when I get older….

  5. Gotta love Lee Zieger…

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